Twenties Tango
This goes out to my HOTTIES in their 20’s.
I have only embarked in my twenties chapter a year ago. Now I have been a victim of people always thinking that I’m in my mid-twenties. Used to make me think it’s because maybe I need some Botox or filler. I was in my head making up the idea that I had wrinkles. In time I was told that it was my mannerisms, the way I carried myself, and how put together I am.
Now while I do appreciate that I am put together; all of us are experiencing life for the first time. The 20’s are particularly special; we have a lot our life’s first during this time. That first big job, first apartment, first serious relationship, first roommate, first time living alone, first time moving to a new city, and many more. There is something so beautiful about your first, so much room for success and same amount for failure.
I can’t help but think that labeling setbacks or mistakes as “failures” seems irrational, especially when we're young and navigating these experiences for the first time. If you think about it is quite funny how we put these harsh expectations when half the time that you are in our twenties our frontal lobe isn’t even fully developed. Science has shown us that our prefrontal cortex is typically fully matured by age 25, some studies even suggest into the early 30’S. So, I guess what I’m saying is give yourself some grace in our 20’s we are still growing and still maturing.
One of my closest friends (Mark) tells me all the time that I have my life together. We had a quick little catch up session the other day and he’s basically known me my whole life. So, he has a good idea about where I started in life and some things I’ve been through. He was amazed that I had done everything and working on everything I said I would. Joining the Air Force, finish training early, pursuing my bachelor's degree, and doing volunteer work. It made me laugh, only thing I could say was “why wouldn’t I do all the things I set out to do?”
I have always known what I wanted to do and if things changed, I adapted. For all my friends that ask, “how I do it?” or “how do I keep up?” It comes down to why not. As young people we set out to do things we want and love. Some have given up and been through so much to be where they are. So, why not set out to do the things you want to do. Doesn’t always matter how you get there but that your journey was unique to you. That you stayed true, made mistakes, made huge leaps, and even encountered setbacks. However, progress is not linear especially when it comes to life.
In no way I am minimizing the struggles, but things require work. It’s okay to feel lost and not know what you want. There are plenty of people who are. As long as you're working on improving overall, the end result will be positive. If you are more like me and know exactly what you want it is also okay to feel overwhelmed. It is okay to take a step back to re-evaluate, to reprioritize, and sometimes a fresh pair of eyes is just what we need. One day at time with one goal at a time, and the goal keeps getting closer.
So, the biggest take away is the Twenties Tango will be chaotic, but it is so beautiful. We only get to be in our twenties once; take this time to figure yourself out, make the mistakes, and take the risk. You won’t get this time back and in your 30’s you’ll reminisce on these experiences/ memories. Live your 20’s the way you want to and don’t let anyone tell you different.
Till next time HOTTIES (mwah)
